May is for Lilacs

A year ago in May the lilacs were blooming. Just like they are this year. You can count on them to make their entrance this time every year. Purple lilacs are my favorite May flower for several reasons.

I have sweet remembrances of home and mother and lilacs. We had a lilac bush in the corner of our front yard that would bloom every year just in time for Memorial Day. I watched, year after year, mother cut the thin branches of white and purple lilacs and fill metal coffee cans to the brim... making beautiful arrangements. The sweet fragrance of lilac floated on the Spring air, bringing a sense of awareness to the importance of their existence. They not only brought beauty to our home as they set in a vase on the dining room table, but they played a much greater role... that of sweet remembrances.

Every Memorial Day our family went to the Price City Cemetery, filled the cans of lilacs with water, and lovingly placed them at the headstones of loved ones who had passed away. My grandparents... mother's mom and dad, were the ones I remember spending the most time at.

I knew that placing lilacs on their graves was a special occasion. It was one of reverence and remembrance, to reflect on cherished memories, and to make a silent tribute of love and gratitude in the role they played in our lives. 

That tradition has so much more meaning in my life since the days of my youth. I have come to know and appreciate, so much more, what it means to tenderly place lilacs on my loved one's graves.

I have since buried both my parents and a daughter and a son. I take them buckets of lilacs to place on their graves every Memorial Day... with gratitude in my heart for having the blessing of having them in my life and being able to love them and be loved back.

My daughter, Shaniel, loved the color purple. She loved flowers and planted a variety of colorful flowers in her beds and garden. She started most of her plants from seed and placed the paper cups in a large south facing window in her kitchen. She had a "green thumb." 

Last year I placed lilacs on Shaniel's grave and wrote this poem. This year I will do the same thing. Because I love her! Because of the remembrances of what this special occasion means. It is love, respect, gratitude, and sweet reflections and remembrances of a daughter lost too soon.

The cup in the vase was far too

 small. 

It would take an arm full of

 lilacs... and a thousand

 more! 

To place by your side... my angel,

 my love.

I'll visit you oft until we meet

 again, 

Bringing beautiful fresh lilacs to

 remind me of you.

My son, Steven, loved starting plants and flowers from seed and watching them grow in his greenhouse. He especially loved roses and bleeding hearts. His yard was a welcome refuge for birds of all kinds. A bird house could be spotted in a tree, on a fence, or tucked in an unknown hiding place. He had a tender heart for plants, animals, and all God's creations. My heart is so happy when I think of my son and the joy he had playing in dirt.

Since the passing of my children, I have created a special "memorial garden" in my yard. I've been working on it for a few years, since Shaniel's death. The garden is centered around a room size pergola.The Wisteria is in its 3rd year and is coming along nicely. The other plants were put in this Spring. Lilacs, Peonies, burning bush, and small shrubs. 
I found the perfect statues for the garden that make my heart so happy. I can sit in my lovely garden and reflect on all the happy memories of my children and watch my grandchildren play.

I'm still waiting on Sweet Autumn Clematis to plant at the front beams of the pergola extension, the bleeding heart, and a wonderfully colorful and whimsy birdhouse. When the plants are mature it's going to be a favorite hideaway for all members of the family... young and old. Can't wait!

May is for lilacs, cherished remembrances and a peaceful heart.

Together again... 

Shaniel - 1980 - 2013

Steven - 1983 - 2015

Inspired by Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop