Sick

I am an optimistic person for the most part. I look at the glass half-full rather than half-empty. I tend to look at the world through rose colored glasses. I don't deal with stress very well. I try to avoid it. Sure, there have been times in my life that are painful to think about, and I wondered at the time if I would ever get through it. But I do. I usually don't write about things that take me into a dark time in life. But, today I will be brave. I will write it and never, ever go there again.

The last time you were sick...

I've been a pretty healthy person most of my life. It was hard to relate to all the commercials advertising the latest and greatest pill for a cure-all. I had really never been sick. Maybe a cold, here or there. Not much else. I am lucky to be married to an agriculturist who has a green thumb. And, I myself, have a Home Economics degree with a minor in food and nutrition. We have always grown a garden, and have a fruit orchard with every fruit we can possibly grow here in the Western U.S. We are surrounded with good things to eat. A healthy diet is one key to good health. So, I really never worried too much about my health. Until...

last year. A nagging UTI led me into surgery to repair my bladder. I had a hard time recovering, and had to continue for another 2 months on antibiotics to rid myself of infection. Another couple of months went by. In December, abdominal pain hit me. Was sent to the hospital for a CT. Di.ver.ti.cu.li.tis. I had a lot to learn about the disease. I would go through another 2 rounds of antibiotics to rid the infection. It was painful. Changed my bowel habits. I was put on a liquid diet. Also... no dairy, no fat, no oils (from gall stones also found during an ultrasound). I lost 20 lbs in two weeks. I was weak and nauseous. I had severe pain and cramping. Couldn't even get to the bathroom on time. All I could do is lay on the bed and stare at the wall. No appetite, food tastes bad. Couldn't even read a few pages from a book or get on the computer. I knew I was sick... really sick. Back to the doctor. Put in the hospital. Extremely dehydrated. Lacked phosphorous, potassium, magnesium. IV fluids in both arms. Put on the nuclear weapons (how my doc put it) of all antibiotics. If this won't kill it once and for all, nothing will. Found out that all the antibiotics I had taken for so long, took all the good bacteria out of my gut and replaced it with the bad stuff. C-dif. A horrible infection I would not wish on my worst enemy (not that I have any). A week long stay in the hospital. Sent home on another 10 days of the strong antibiotics. 

A couple of very early mornings in the hospital I felt so bad I prayed my mother would be allowed to come down from heaven and wrap her loving and comforting arms around me, wipe away my tears, and tell me everything was going to be all right. I cried myself to sleep several times while wishing her there. I knew then and there, I would never be too old to need the comfort of my mother. Oh... if I could just feel her tender touch, I know I would feel better. I yearn for her.

I'm on my third day since coming home from the hospital. I've had extreme nausea, and can hardly get the antibiotics down. But the days are getting a little better. Food is tasting a little better. I'm on a soft diet. And, as much as I love water, it, too, has been a little hard for me to swallow. But it's a little better today, too. Today is the first day getting back on the computer. I even think I will try and read a little today. 

There is always a lesson to be learned from our experiences. I've been in a fog the last month and am not sure what it is that I need to learn. But I hope I do so I never have to come to this dark place again in my life.

On a brighter note, two very sweet and thoughtful daughters, disinfected and cleaned my entire house before I came home from the hospital. Top to bottom. Even the baseboards. And it's a BIG house... almost 8000 square feet. It was so overwhelming when I walked in the house to see the sparkle and shine bounce off the wood floors and counters. The house smelled so fresh and clean. Everything perfect. Everything in order. My husband said he was going downstairs. I said... "I think I'll cry! And I did! The greatest gift a mother could have is good, thoughtful children. A nurse had commented on the good deed, and wondered why they would come without being asked. My daughter's response....

You raised me mom!

So, you can imagine the overwhelming gratitude I felt in my heart when I opened up the door to my house that had been so lovingly scrubbed. Just because they love their mother!

writing prompt #3: The last time you were sick...